Let’s talk about fire. With matches.
NO! Not that kind of fire, you twisted reader of my words. I’m talking about the fire that can happen naturally when two people get together. For reasons that I do not completely understand, I have been responsible for a few people meeting and falling in love. It’s pretty cool and because two of them now live less than one mile from my house, I thought I would share what they told me about their youth.
The Charles Street Meet
Many years ago I had a student named Josh (not his real name). Josh was a great kid, very outgoing and nice to everyone. I secretly used to recruit all kinds of kids like that to join band. It didn’t matter if they had musical instrument skills or not; it was all about the attitude. Having a band room full of kids that wanted to be there, make music, have fun and learn about life was exactly what I tried to build over and over again as kids aged out of the music program and more came in. Granted, the vast majority of these band kids began playing one year before they got to me, but when a kid in another class had the goods, I would make a run to try to recruit. This was the case with poor young Josh. You wanna be an awesome kid but you don’t toot a horn? I’ve got a deal for you my friend….I’m the music man.
Well Josh used to eat lunch in my room along with a few other 8th grade kids who hung out for the vibe. My room was set up like a clubhouse with album covers on the wall, the stereo usually on and chairs in a big circle so the kids could hang. I usually sat behind my desk also having lunch, planning, catching up on emails, grading, and keeping half an ear on the kids. The rule was, after eating, if they wanted to stay in my room for recess, they had to play their instruments. Josh didn’t play anything so I told him the only way he got a ticket to ride was to learn how to play something. As with 90% of non instrument kids, Josh wanted drums, but I already had (and always had) way too many concussionists….err…I mean percussionists.
I asked Josh to try baritone horn. This is a low brass instrument which is held on the lap. It has a big mouthpiece which is easy to get a first sound on. It also has 3 valves, and operates like a trumpet. My secret was that I desperately needed (and always needed) more low brass. I told Josh that it was low and loud and could be annoying….just like him. Boom. Recess lessons began.
He tried really hard. He was awful. I felt bad but I wouldn’t give up on him for a few weeks until he finally said: “Moeschen, this isn’t working. I’m going to stay in regular music class where we only learn a little piano. This isn’t really fun for me.”
I respect honesty and, as I said, I loved the kid. What I didn’t know at the time is that he had made a new friend.
Some of the middle school band kids who ate lunch and congregated in my room did so because they felt it was a safe space, and less chaotic than the lunch room. Some of these kids were quiet, shy, and just wanted to decompress from the school noise. That was Danielle (not her real name).
Danielle came in with her lunch tray each day and quietly sat in front of my desk sharing stories of her friends, her clarinet music and life in general. She was a sweet kid, very smart and very reserved.
I didn’t even notice that she was speaking with Josh. I had no idea that they met during these lunches. There were usually 10-12 kids in the room, and I wasn’t always engaged in the pockets of group chatter, even though I pretended to be…
After grade 8, the kids left my school and went to the high school. If they continued in band, I would see some of them occasionally at a high school football game or a combined concert. Some of the serious music kids would visit after school, sit in with the jazz band kids, or come back as an upperclassman to intern with me. The vast majority of students simply moved on, grew up and started their lives. Bye Josh! Bye Danielle! Good luck!
Imagine my surprise many years later when I found out that Josh and Danielle went to different high schools, dated different people, graduated, bumped into each other, dated briefly, broke up, spent a few years apart and with other people, got together again, dated more seriously, fell in love, got married, built a house less than one mile from me, and will be celebrating the birth of their first child on or around Easter 2026. The kid’s middle name will be MOESCHEN!
OK, I made up that last part, but Vanessa and I now see Josh and Danielle regularly. They are our neighbors and our friends. It has been wonderful to be a part of their adult lives. Josh still doesn’t play an instrument, but he can fix all kinds of machines, and he shoots a mean Nerf gun when battling my kids in the yard during our ambush attacks down on Charles Street. Danielle shares gardening passions with my wife, and we often visit outside when on family walks.
All because a couple of kids hung out in the band room.
Teaching is more than just sharing knowledge. It’s building a nurturing environment where people can grow. Josh and Danielle….I love you guys.
Stay safe, stay awesome, and stay tuned.
Patrick moeschen 